Redemption
by sora1shiro
Summary: When Naruto was attacked by a mob of villagers, he was told that everything happened because God didn't love him. So how can he be loved again? WARNINGS: Blood, gore, excessive language, craziness, maybe some OOC-ness as well. DISCLAIMER: I own nothing of the Naruto series, only my ideas. While I am okay with adoption, I ask that you credit me for my brain baby.
1. Chapter 1

It was the sixth anniversary of the Yondaime's triumph over the Kyuubi no Kitsune. Of course there was a grand festival, but that was mostly for the children who were too young to remember that terrible night. When the children were out joining the forced festivities, the older survivors clutched their discounted sake and drowned their sorrows so reality lost its harsh edge.

But in the shadier part of Konoha, where the cheery atmosphere couldn't quite reach and vendors didn't dare put up shop, a small boy sat huddled at the center of a mob of drunkards.

His once bright blond hair stained red and pieces of glass tearing into his skin. Tears and snot dripped down his face as he cried, terror freezing him in place.

His face was swelling and limbs bruising, but that only spurred his attackers on. After all, if the demon could bruise in its mortal shell, whats to say it can't be killed?

Ghastly cheers resounded in the narrow street when yet another bottle was thrown over the boy's head, alcohol seeping into his wounds, both old and new. Screams of agony could be heard when a few more daring shinobi arrived at the scene. They got creative with the weapons in their pouch and the jutsu in their arsenal.

The sickening stench of burnt skin permeated the air and the boy struggled to curl into himself more.

Limbs broken and twisted, it was a wonder how the boy was still alive. A horrendous amount of blood stained the ground and seeped into the rags he called clothes.

The once clean shirt was dirty and tattered, stained from both dirt and spilled blood of past run-ins like this. The poor boy couldn't imagine why he was the only one treated like this, why they would do this at all. He desperately wanted answers!

"Why?" he sobbed. "Why d'ya do this?! I ain't done nothin' to ya! To any of ya!"

A hush fell over the crowd as his words fanned the flames if their anger. How dare the demon speak out to them, to plead its innocence using that wretched face in mocking trickery?! One of the civilians came forward, more than willing to speak for the others.

"Because you've been abandoned by God! How could anybody love a demon like you? You've lost your humanity and now you must pay for your sins! REPENT, DAMN YOU!" With his part said, he lunged forward and gouged the boy's pretty blue eye out of its socket.

The resulting scream was unholy. The boy thrashed wildly, clutching at his now-empty socket as gore fell from the wound.

ANBU decided to intervene at that moment, having been tasked with watching over the young Uzumaki. They held no love for the boy, but they were loyal to the Hokage, and the Hokage didn't want the brat dead.

However, there was a fine line between _maimed_ and _dead_.

So when the crowd became a little too gung-ho about their self-appointed mission to end the Kyuubi, they thought it best to step in before things escalated further.

"I'd think it wise to stop here, Mr. Shinohara," came the emotionless voice of the shinobi with the snake mask.

"Why do you protect the demon?! Is this what the village stands for?! Well, I won't have it! We might have been repaid in blood, but only its life can pay for its sins!"

"We will use lethal force if you do not step down. I ask you again, please step down, Mr. Shinohara."

The old civilian clenched his jaw, glaring furiously at the boy behind the ANBU. He could see that some of the more minor scrapes and bruises were healing right before his eyes. This was too good a chance to pass up. They might never get the opportunity to kill the demon before it matures and comes to power!

Foregoing any and all of his common sense, he raised his hand and crushed the boy's eye to permanently weaken the demon. He felt a sick pleasure at the feeling of soft delicate tissue squishing between his fingers. He might be damning his soul, but it was for the greater good.

"I will kill the demon fox tonight!" he roared and aimed to charge at the boy. He didn't get very far though, as the snake ANBU unsheathed their tanto and sliced into the back of his neck. The short sword didn't cut through cleanly but stuck in the spine. It would surely kill him.

Rising from their kneeling position, Snake faced the crowd once more, before they calmly spoke.

"Do you stand down?" While it was phrased as a question, they said it more like a command. The effect was instantaneous. Frightened civilians lost their fight and fled the scene, the more arrogant shinobi grumbling and shooting them venomous glares while slinking into the shadows. Snake then addressed their partner.

"Monkey, get the body. You take Mr. Shinohara to the morgue and I'll head to the Hokage Tower to inform Lord Third of what has transpired on this night." Monkey nodded and grabbed the body, settling it under their arm.

In unison, they hopped onto a rooftop before body flickering to their given destinations, not paying any mind to the small shivering form of the broken boy.

* * *

Naruto was shocked and in agony. Although he could feel the pain lessening as the minutes ticked by, there was still a burning sensation where his eye had been.

All his life he'd wondered why he was hated by the village, and today he had finally solved the mystery. God hated him, so it was only natural everyone else did as well. After all, he had no parents and his pranking hobby hadn't gained him any love either. Really, it was a wonder that he hadn't figured it out sooner!

Still curled on the ground, little Naruto let out a choked sob. So as long as God hated him, he couldn't be loved? All his efforts for recognition and acknowledgment were in vain?

That had to be the most painful thing that happened to him on this night his realization that his efforts were useless. That he couldn't fight against the hand fate had dealt him. He wanted to be loved. Who didn't? The only problem was attaining that love. He'd have to find a way to redeem himself in the eyes of God.

By now the largest of his wounds had closed and his bones had started mending. Naruto got up from his fetal position, being mindful of the still fragile bones.

He resolved to go to the small apartment he called home and think over his situation a bit more. Who knows, maybe he'll find the solution to his problems tomorrow at the academy. He could always ask Sandaime-jiji. He seemed to know everything!

So he slowly and carefully limped, holding his hand to the still painfully burning eye. He didn't know if _that_ would grow back, as he'd never actually lost a limb before.

It felt odd to know that he wasn't whole anymore. He found it ironic that when most people said they didn't feel whole, they meant it metaphorically, while in his case it was meant in the most literal sense possible. He hoped this wouldn't interfere with his dream to be Hokage. That would suck.

Soon enough, he finally stumbled into his small and dumpy apartment. The knob to the front door was broken, graffiti and holes littered his dirty walls, and most of his possessions were upturned or broken.

Sadly enough, this wasn't exactly a new scene to the young boy. For all he could remember, it'd happened at the orphanage. Now they'd just followed him here as well.

He sighed, already wishing to sleep in his surely ruined bed, but started setting things back in order. Not that there'd been much when he left in the first place.

Naruto stood back, feeling dead on his feet now that everything was done and over with.

The boy shuffled towards his bedroom, stopping in the doorway to lean against the wooden frame. Just as he'd predicted, they'd gotten to his bed too. Broken glass tore at the hard mattress and small dead animals littered the sheets. While he was sad at the loss of innocent life, he wasn't phased by these acts of violence anymore.

Instead of grieving, he simply grabbed his ratty blanket, cleared a spot on his dull wooden floor, then settled down to sleep off the stress and fear of the day.

While the damp patches of animal blood felt uncomfortable, he paid it little mind, focusing on getting some rest.

 _Happy birthday, Naruto._


	2. Chapter 2

**Lol, when you think I'd be updating CotF first. Sorry, not sorry.**

* * *

When Naruto woke up, he felt groggy and less awake than usual. He felt like the previous night was all a vicious nightmare, a product of his imagination; but the bloodstained blanket and stickiness of his own dried blood reminded him that it was real.

As usual though, he could already tell that he would be late for class, if he wasn't already. Glass was still cluttered in the corners and strewn about the floor, telltale glint barely visible to him thanks to the peeking rays of the morning sun. Picking up his small alarm clock from its face-down position by his door, he saw that it was nine o'clock.

Class had started by now, so why not tidy up the room a bit? He'd just go to class during the lunch break.

And so that's what he set off to do. Slipping on his blue sandals, he walked into the tiny kitchen to retrieve his broom and dustpan. First order of business: clean up the bed. This too was covered in broken glass, though it wasn't like he had the money to buy a new one. The only option left was to clean it, try cleaning it some more, and then burn it if that didn't work.

Rolling up the thin comforter, he dragged both that and the sheets out to the deck to hang on the clothesline. (Sometimes the dryer decided it didn't want to work, and he had to leave everything out to the mercy of the elements and the villagers.)

When he had as much as he could fit strung up, he gripped his old broom and took a swing.

Glass, dust, and who _knows_ what else immediately clouded around him, falling to the wooden planks beneath his feet and to the ground below.

Evidently, he did not think this through.

Little shards of light stuck to his clothes and flew into his nest of hair. Already, he could feel the burning itch of tiny cuts accumulating, though he couldn't really stop now that he'd started. When he was all done cleaning, he'd be sure to change into that new orange jumpsuit Hokage-jiji had gifted him before the whole festival debacle.

The dust had settled now, but Naruto was sure that that was not the end to the shards embedded within the bedding. And so he whacked some more, eventually using his anger and frustration to fuel his hits.

With each hit, he felt a little better and less angry; his breaths quickening as his hits lost their mindless edge. He wasn't okay, not yet. But it was a start.

When his arms tired of their swinging, he bundled everything up once more and put it in the small washer that always protested loudly, but worked nonetheless.

After that, he started sweeping the clutter to a contained pile. Likely everything that he swept up would be broken or unusable, and therefore garbage. It was with a heavy heart that he had to include a few articles of clothing in this category as well. He'd just have to scavenge for more at a later date.

It was then that he remembered the small carcasses scattered about. He wasn't quite sure how he'd managed to forget about them, seeing as he'd had to clear the bedding and floor of them, but the smell of his apartment was a tad overripe when he accidentally stepped on one. Disgusted, he gathered them together and plotted to pelt the main perpetrators with them when he had the time.

Looking around, he saw that there wasn't much he could do at this point. The paint would take more effort to remove than he was willing to put in at the moment, and there was no remedy for a soiled mattress other than letting it air out.

Since he was almost positive all of his food was either pilfered or expired, the last thing he could do was take a shower and change his clothes.

So he hopped into the always cold shower, scrubbed himself down, and quickly hopped out before a chill could settle. Though the process wasn't always as extensive as today, this was his daily routine. And despite how it's been so far, Naruto was almost excited for the day to come.

He'd never gotten to wear anything nice before, and disregarding the bright hue, his new jumpsuit was of quality material that would be more durable and stain-resistant. It was one of the best, _(and only,)_ presents he'd ever received!

He looked at the clock again. _11:48 A.M._ Lunch break would start in about ten minutes; perfect time to catch a bowl of ramen.

* * *

The stares and whispers were more obvious today. The ones who hadn't participated in yesterday's hunt were slightly appalled when they saw the state of his eye. They all knew of his heightened regenerative abilities; for it to _not_ be on the mend meant something drastic had been done, and someone had most likely been punished for it.

While most sneered when he accidentally made eye contact, there were surprisingly few smirks sent his way.

That was fine though. God didn't love him, so why would they?

Walking up to his favorite ramen stand, he initiated his usual greeting.

"One large bowl of miso, old man!"

"Comin' right up, Naruto! This one's on the house since we didn't see you yester...day. Naruto, what happened to your eye?" Teuchi asked in concern when he went to face his favorite customer.

Naruto started. He'd nearly forgotten about his new blindspot and felt a little self-conscious facing such blatant concern for his well-being.

"Oh, this? Eh-heh, um, training accident?"

Teuchi looked unimpressed with his transparent lie but chose to keep his questions at bay when he saw Naruto's pleading look. Instead, he sighed.

"Okay kid. You've gotta be more careful in the future, though." Naruto almost sighed in relief but refrained. Instead, he gave his trademark close-eyed smile.

"Sure thing, pops! Now, about that free ramen..." The chef gave a deep, bellowing laugh at that, amused and slightly flattered to hear how eager another was for his cooking.

"I've got it right here, don't you worry. Alright; enjoy." The blond happily obliged, digging into the meal with a gusto rivaled only by those of the Akimichi clan. He hadn't eaten any breakfast, so his metabolism was demanding he consume something high-calorie _this instant_ to help speed along the healing process. In summary, he was _famished._ Without him realizing it, one bowl turned into two, and two turned to three. As he was finishing off his most recent conquest, he felt a violent shiver run down his back.

A shadowy figure loomed behind him, expression not unlike an enraged bull.

"Skipping again, are we?" The blond immediately stopped slurping his noodles, and slowly turned to face the teacher. Honestly, despite not even entertaining the _thought_ of inflicting pain upon him like the villagers, the chuunin was still downright scary.

" _Hey_ , Iruka-sensei," he said awkwardly, scratching at the nape of his neck. "How's your day been?"

"Oh, _just peachy_. In fact, I'd say it was a little _too_ good since the class was so quiet without you there to liven things up," the older man said, his glare contradicting his cheery words.

"Wow sensei; that almost sounded like a compliment." Naruto was sweating a bit from the heat of Iruka's passive-aggressive wrath and hoped to stall the man for enough time to marginally calm his temper.

"What did I say about-," he stopped abruptly. "What happened to your face, Naruto?"

Naruto was then acutely aware of the concern of his teacher, something mostly unfamiliar to him.

"Eh, it's nothing. Just an accident from... training," he finished lamely, just remembering the lie he told to Teuchi, who was now blatantly listening in to their conversation with a suspicious look on his face.

Though unlike Teuchi, Iruka didn't accept his excuse so easily.

"You're still a kid, Naruto; you can't work yourself so hard. And I highly doubt you went to get treated by the hospital staff judging by those shoddy bandages. Come," he said, pulling the small boy from his stool.

"W-where are you taking me, Iruka-sensei?" He had a good idea of where the agitated teacher was taking him, but that didn't mean he liked it at all.

"To the hospital, of course," Iruka said like that should've been apparent from the start.

Naruto locked his legs, throwing his weight against the hold in an attempt to halt their progress. Iruka tried to keep pulling but stopped when he saw that the boy really wouldn't budge.

"Come on, Naruto. We need to get that treated before it gets infected!"

"No! I don't care; I'm not going in that hellish place you call a hospital and not even _you_ can make me!"

"Naruto, it's for your _own good._ Now come on!"

"No!" The blond tore away from his teacher's grip, determined to stay away. If he went to the hospital as Iruka wanted, he was sure he'd acquire even more damage, be it by an "accident" or poisoning. Everyone hated him, and he wouldn't put it past them to try to kill him now that he was weakened.

He would not be going to the nest of vipers; not today.

Knowing that his teacher didn't understand, (probably didn't want to anyway,) he ran. He knew that on his good days, he could evade even the best ANBU, but today was not one of those. To up his chances of escape, he pulled out all the stops: he took sharp turns, pushed through crowds before anyone recognized him, and circled back every once in a while to put the spontaneity he was known for to use.

When he finally stopped, he felt a wetness trail down his cheek. Lifting a hand to feel what it was, his fingers came back smeared with blood. His wound had started bleeding again from all the sudden exercise, and he just noticed a dull throb had settled behind his eye, almost like when he got extreme migraines.

His breaths came out in ragged gasps and he desperately wanted to double over to catch his breath. But no, he had to maintain a straight posture and open airway.

He didn't know how long he'd been standing in that dim alleyway trying to regain breath, focusing on his breathing exercises, but he eventually noticed Iruka sitting off to the side. He was far enough away to remain mostly unnoticed and unregistered as a threat, but close enough to block the other escape route that led to a larger maze of passageways.

God, now Naruto just felt pitiful. He tried his hardest, but that effort amounted to nothing in the end.

Hoping he didn't look like a petulant child, he slid down the rough brick wall to join the other on the floor, sitting opposite in the hard dirt.

They sat in silence, neither willing to be the first to acknowledge the "elephant in the room," so to speak. While the blond remained unmoving in his still silence, the chuunin sighed and spoke up to break the ice.

"Why won't you come with me? It's the _hospital;_ you're supposed to be able to trust them." Iruka's hurt statement hung in the air like a heavy accusation. But why did it matter to him? Who cared about the demon boy that gained just more wound? Who cared if the little demon boy won't go to the hospital? Just a step closer to its death, others would say. Others would rejoice at his hurt, at the thought of having the opportunity to let that hurt fester and hurt more. So why didn't he?

"A fear of doctors is completely normal for a kid your age, but you shouldn't let that stop you from getting the help you need. How will you be able to continue through the academy as a ninja, to achieve your dream of Hokage if that doesn't get better?" the teacher ranted.

While it might have been meant to inspire him, it just made Naruto more aware of how unreachable his dream was.

"It doesn't matter. Becoming Hokage, having parents _even if they're dead,_ none of that matters! So what if I don't want to go to the hospital?! No one will care, even if I die!" They stared at each other, his outburst even surprising Naruto himself.

"Naruto, that's not-"

"No, it's fine. Sorry for wasting your time; I'm sure class has resumed by now." Naruto stormed off before allowing Iruka further say. He didn't want to hear any of the usual lies today; wasn't in the mood for the cheap platitudes fed to all orphaned children so boost their confidence and give them hope in The Will of Fire.

But now where would he go? Ichiraku Ramen was off the table; (it'd be too predictable and easy to trace, not to mention he wasn't hungry anymore.) His home... wasn't even an option. There was absolutely no way he'd be going back to that depressing shit-hole that was his home, the mess that it was.

But maybe...? There was the smallest chance that he'd be allowed to visit Hokage-jiji, and with him, the heavy security clearance needed for access. And really, that was the safest place for someone like him, (and it'd been a while since he'd paid a visit with a reason other than property damage.)

* * *

 **Oof. This ended up being longer than I like, (and also mostly set-up for the next chapter that'll be a bit more significant to the plot.)**

 **I wanted to work on this story more, but I'm having more than a bit of trouble with this Naruto's characterization, so the next update might come after chapter 9 of Cries of the Forest.**

 **And I got a rough outline started, and let me just say, I'm gonna fuck your shit up... if we ever get there. We've got elements of OP!Naruto, Insane!Naruto, ANBU!Naruto, Jashinist!Naruto, and so much more. This is probably going to be one of the most difficult things I've written, what with both action+religious themes. If all goes well, I'll definitely be a better writer by the end of it. In the meantime, read, comment, enjoy, and keep an eye out for the next update!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Yo, looking through my bookmarks on AO3 i D**

* * *

He traversed the route to the Hokage Tower with an ease born of practice, a familiar path that he'd trodden at least a hundred times before.

None of the usual guards were on the alert for the troublemaker and didn't anticipate his appearance. After all, he'd done nothing wrong, and what excuse did they have to stop the boy from visiting the strongest shinobi in the village? It was almost laughable to think that the small boy could even land a _hit_ on the Hokage, even with the tailed beast and favoritism to show.

So Naruto continued on his merry way, slipping past the too-lax guards and secretary that was just there for show.

Not bothering to knock, he walked through the creaky door and made his customary greeting.

"Hey, Gramps! How's the paperwork treatin' ya?" His glower was all the answer he needed

Though his day had gone terribly so far, it still made him happy to see the old man, frown and all. And buried as he was in his dreadful paperwork, the Hokage very nearly didn't notice his condition. Notice: _nearly._

"What happened to your eye, Naruto?" Hearing the command behind the question, Naruto had to look away as he grudgingly replied:

"Birthday didn't go so well yesterday; what's new." The sound of a tightened grip on his pen was the only sign of distress from the man, and he didn't say anything for a moment.

"The one responsible?"

"Taken care of, _unwillingly_." Mr. Shinohara would've gotten off with a warning had he not tried to finish what he'd started, though Naruto wasn't quite sure that the Hokage knew that. He'd seemed to have ignored what the boy'd tacked on, and was back to staring at the bandaged eye.

"I presume you have yet to get it treated properly at the hospital," he said, sighing heavily and rubbing at his eyes, already imagining the stack of papers that would later grace his workload.

"Actually, just outran Iruka-sensei wanting to take me himself!" And if he was a wee too proud of outrunning the uncannily intuitive chuunin, no one pointed it out.

"You speak as if you've escaped The Devil himself," the old man said, an amused twinkle in his eyes.

"You would too if you had to endure his idea of punishment!" Naruto shot back. Having gotten caught during many a prank lent to some hefty experience with the man's sense of justice and sadism. Relatively mild compared to what the guys at TI probably specialized in, but no less terrifying to the young boy.

The old man just chuckled at the younger's theatrics, fond of his unique perspective. After a moment though, he had to sober so he could deal with the issue at hand.

"Come now, let's get you to the hospital," he said, rising from his chair.

"But I don't wanna!" Naruto whined, but knew there was very little he could do to actually escape his fate. But then Hiruzen softened, and settled down again to discreetly have an ANBU send him a med-nin.

"Alright then, you won't have to go to the hospital. But you _are_ going to cooperate so the medic I called for can check you over. The wound does not often kill the shinobi; inactivity or infection does."

Naruto pouted but agreed. The eye in question was constantly throbbing, a pain that seemed to be worse than the pain of it being ripped from his skull in the first place. And if seeing this medic would get people off his back, then it was a small price to pay for being "healthy" and not going to the hospital.

Thankfully, there was little time to regret his allowance and wonder if he could escape through the window before the medic ninja appeared in a kneeling salute, masked head held down as they awaited their orders.

"Rise, Gator. I need you to look at Naruto over here, see what you can do."

"Yes, Lord Third."

Ever so reluctantly, Naruto allowed the intimidating anbu to approach, eye pointedly looking away from the dark holes that were their eyes and keeping it trained to their glowing hands. It was awkward to stand there while the ninja was doing their job, appearing to be doing a diagnostic scan while The Third had gone back to muttering unintelligibly and scribbling on papers.

"Report: other than the remaining dead matter of the eye, there's nothing to be done. The optic nerve has already started repairing itself and would likely be unreceptive in the case of an implant."

This was news to Naruto. He was unaware that Mr. Shinohara hadn't taken the whole thing out, or that there was a chance of an implant in the first place! But... wait, didn't this mean he couldn't get one even if he wanted one?

How was he to be a ninja without an eye? Did this mean he wouldn't get a shot at his (now mostly forgotten) dream of being Hokage?!

"Thank you, Gator. If you could remove the excess tissue before it starts rotting, that would be greatly appreciated."

"Yes, Lord Third."

"Remove...?" A glimpse of whatever metal instrument Gator was in the process of pulling out clued him in to the events that would quickly take place if he didn't _do something._ "Ah, let's not be too hasty here! I uh, is this really necessary?!" He really wasn't too keen on the idea of another foreign object going anywhere _near_ his eye, even if it was currently just a small scrap of remaining tissue.

"Naruto, it's for your own good. If it's left unattended, it will surely fester and cause more problems. Now stop making a fuss and get it over with. I'm sure Gator will make it as painless as possible."

"I-I don' wanna!" Seeing that his protests had no effect on the advancing anbu, he turned tail and _ran._ Logically, he knew he didn't have much of a chance against anbu, but he had fear fuelling him and they had little actual reason to chase him to the fullest of their abilities.

And that's how he found himself in what looked vaguely like a library. Of course, to him, it looked more like a forgotten storage room for old books and scrolls, but the Hokage, well... The Hokage would tell him he had absolutely no business being in The Hokage's Library.

As it was, it just looked like a handful of _really_ old scrolls of various sizes with the occasional book standing lonesome near a shelf divider. And despite the ridiculously large scroll taking up the majority of the room's corner space, there was this _one book_ that caught his attention. It didn't strike him to be the oldest, but it certainly showed more wear and tear than the others.

Pulling it out, he saw that it wasn't thick either, rather both the binding and pages seemed to be unusually thin, the cover being a fairly light honey color with dark scars and absolutely no details. But more than these minor details, it was fairly nondescript.

The small seven-years-old wasn't normally one for reading, but there was just _something about this book_ that made him want to read it for hours on end.

He didn't think that would be a viable option in the cramped space he'd found himself in, so he instead shoved it to the front of his waistband, hoping his baggy shirt hid it well enough and walked back into the hallway that had dimmed in the time he was running and hiding.

How long was he in that room? It only felt like a few minutes.

By now, he had all but forgotten about his promise to himself to sneak into the classroom he was supposed to have spent his day in and was instead heading back to his trashed apartment, intent on reading that small book that called to him so.

* * *

 **Short chapter, but I'll be continuing soon now that the plot is finally picking up. Kinda proud of myself for pushing so many chapters out, but also horrified that I actually published more stories. And how is it that no one else has thought of these plots? I feel like I'm just writing things because I can't find them anywhere else. Most of the things I published are plot bunnies that I'd like someone else to toy with if they feel like it. Honestly, if you want to use my concepts, feel free; just credit me and send it to me because I wanna read it too!**

 **(Also, ngl but I feel edgy as fuck whenever I sit down and write for this story.)**


	4. Chapter 4

**That moment when you're like _'yo, how am I supposed to make this happen?'_ then you look at your sketchy outline and see it's already been (mostly) written through. _(except when the plot writes itself and you have to revise the damn outline to keep track of everything...)_**

* * *

He didn't immediately read the book as he'd intended. Despite the still questionable cleanliness of his abode, he chose to instead attempt to do what he knew Iruka and Mizuki probably went through during today's class. (They had a habit of going through history and maths chapter by chapter, so the only problem was _absorbing_ the information.)

A boring few hours were spent reading over the content, struggling to understand how an equation looked like _that_ after just one step and how that happened, then trying to understand why this or that happened in history, (there was a lot of useless petty squabbles to be seen in the past, that had somehow been allowed to escalate to an all-out _war_ between clans.) It didn't really help him to take notes, so he didn't even bother trying to neatly write everything down just so he could look at the same things with the same level of comprehension.

After that was katas, something he was grateful wasn't as monotonous as his previous self-appointed task. Stretching was his first priority, then he had to push his cheap low-standing table to the side to make some room in the small living area of his apartment.

The initial stance was simple enough, if a bit more rigid than he preferred. He didn't like how defensive and straight-forward the style was, but it was necessary to be proficient for him to graduate.

Carefully going from one kata to another he tried his best to imitate Sasuke, (though it irritated him to admit that bro-con really _was_ the best of the class.) He'd never had enough money to spend on a full-length mirror, so he had to settle for squinting at the window. As he went through, he subtly adjusted his stance to be most comfortable, though he wasn't sure if he was supposed to do that or not...

It was past dark when he was satisfied he'd done as best he could without proper guidance, and he decided it was far too late for him to do strength or cardio training.

Nothing to it then; he went to bed dreaming of the book.

* * *

He woke up with little fanfare. His alarm clock was probably at its last minute or so of beeping and he was slightly more comfortable than the last time he'd woken up. His mood had already begun to sour at the thought of school and the increasingly painful throbbing of his missing eye.

Was it really an infection, as Hokage-jii had warned? He'd never had one before, so he wouldn't know.

Forcing himself to go through the motions of his monotonous daily routine, it wasn't long before he found himself walking the streets of Konoha. He wasn't sure why, but he thought that maybe the whispers were louder than usual.

"Did you hear that-"

"-can't believe he actually-"

"Wait, _he_ got-?!"

"-should've let him-"

"-was such a good man."

Obviously, word had gotten around about _the incident._ The whispers were hardly whispers at this point, and it was only Naruto's distraction and disconnect with it all that allowed him to stay calm.

There might have been the occasional stone thrown at him, but he didn't know anymore. He ghosted through the front gates, through the mostly empty halls, then sat in his seat mostly unnoticed. (Iruka might have taken pity on him and stayed silent, or maybe he was just more concerned with the already napping Nara.)

"Alright everyone, you know the drill! Get out your notes; we'll be correcting them, then having our history test!" There was a unanimous chorus of groans, of which he did not partake in. Maybe he'd stayed up too late last night, or maybe it was the pain; everything felt distant, almost fuzzy.

He didn't feel... all the way there. Even when slowly asking for a pencil from a neighbor, and painstakingly writing out the, (what he hoped were,) correct answers. Eventually, he finished. Ran out of time or creativity in faking answers, he didn't know. Iruka might have started on a new lesson, but he wouldn't know that either. All he could do was focus on the blurring lights, increasingly loud ringing in his ears, and intensifying pain in his mostly-empty socket.

It got so bad that he started sweating, and succumbed to the urge to clutch at the bandages covering it. Was it his imagination, or were the bandages hot?

He lost track of time. Was he screaming? Maybe. The liquid falling down his face might have been tears.

And eventually, he didn't know anything.

* * *

He woke up in something that looked like it might be the nurse's office. His stomach growled, and a look at the sun's position confirmed that he'd missed lunch. It might have been his imagination, but his eye seemed strangely full.

It didn't hurt anymore, thankfully, but it felt different from the emptiness he'd grown accustomed to in the few days since the incident.

Disregarding all previous instruction, (and a bit of common sense, too,) he ripped the bandage off and lightly placed his fingers against his right eyelid. Underneath, he felt the soft swell of what he instinctively knew to be an eye, the wetness that protected it from his own skin. He frantically swiveled his eye to look at a far corner of the room and felt the other follow his unthought command. It was with great excitement and no small amount of awe that he went in search of a mirror. Even a kunai would suffice at this point!

He ran down the hallways, uncaring that class was still in session, or that the blond hair and orange suit easily identified him for when he has to face the repercussions. He had to find a mirror, and that meant an emergency bathroom break.

Though he fully expected to have been pursued by a stampede of teachers led by Iruka, the hallway was still empty when he dashed into the boys' bathroom.

Lo and beyond, it was him in all his sickly glory. He was paler than he'd ever been before, and his hair was kind of matted and greasy from his earlier episode. There were bags developing under his eyes, and _his eyes!_ His left was the same crystalline blue he'd always had, but the right was... somewhat unnerving if he was being honest.

His pupil was slit almost like a cat's, and the iris had turned a bright red, (brighter even than all the blood from _that day._ )

Something distracted him, though. In his peripheral, he thought he saw something like a shadow behind him... but no one else was there. As he focused on it though, he thought he could see it clearer.

The figure was crying, hunched over and mumbling something,

 _'Why do they do that, I just want to be loved, love me, I hate you, why can't you just die already, I want to die, no I don't want to die, what will it take, I don't like it, love me, love me-'_

He looked away. He didn't like how familiar it was, how vulnerable its mutterings made him feel.

He liked that he could now see fully, and didn't feel like something was missing or wrong with him. But he didn't think anyone else would think the same. They'd probably fear him more, _hurt_ him more. He'd go back to get the bandage and cover it up again. After all, he wasn't supposed to have an eye again. It was weird for it to be there; normal people didn't just _regain_ lost parts like that.

But as soon as he stepped out of the bathroom, Iruka called out to him.

"Naruto! I thought that you were still in the med bay." He hurriedly clamped the abnormal eye shut as the teacher approached. Iruka clicked his tongue when he saw the small boy's appearance. "What happened to your bandage? You know what, I know that you just got out of the sickbay, but let's go back; just to get some clean bandages for that eye of yours."

"Ah- sure..." If Iruka noticed his strange behavior, he didn't comment on it.

While they walked back to the medbay, the bell rang, and students started pouring in to crowd the hallways. Iruka tried his best to shield the blond from the horde of bodies, but even then they got jostled around as they struggled to their destination.

It was a trial getting there, but it helped that kids gradually went to their next class. Iruka himself seemed to be heaving as be braced himself against the doorway, while Naruto just went to grab the bit of gauze that he was prepared to protect with his life.

Securely tying it in place, he squared his small shoulders and turned to Iruka. The man had perked up considerably in the minute since he'd looked at him, and was watching him with... what was that look in his eyes? He didn't know what to call it, but it didn't really matter since it didn't seem to mean he was hostile. After they finished assessing each other, Iruka stood straight and motioned for him to follow.

"Come, Naruto. I know you had a rough start, but you need to be in class. Gotta be there to make up for when you skip, right?"

He didn't always skip on purpose, but he doubted that Iruka would believe him. So instead of defending himself, he simply nodded, if only to escape the scrutiny he was under.

Their walk back to class was uneventful and just as quiet as when he last left the sickbay and its hard, sterile cots.

Though that was quickly rectified with the opening of the sliding door, releasing a wave of noise as his classmates argued loudly or were goofing off, Mizuki huddled in the corner doing nothing to mediate the problems that would quickly escalate had Iruka not intervened right then.

 _"WHAT_ DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!"

A hush fell over the children and they all froze in their movements.

"Uh..." Someone, (Kiba probably,) seemed about ready to answer his very rhetorical question, when the angry teacher quickly put the class back to rights.

" _SIT DOWN_ OR _SO HELP ME_ I WILL ASSIGN YOUR SEATS AND SHORTEN RECESS FOR THE NEXT WEEK!" As everyone scrambled back to their shared desks, Naruto slinked back to the seat he usually occupied and waited for Iruka to reign in his temper and start the next lesson.

"Why's Naruto-"

"-he'd even bother-"

"-classic dead-last, you know?"

The whispers were starting again. They might not have implied as much violence as the usual sort from the grown-ups, but it still hurt because these were more pointed about _him,_ from his personality to his appearance or punctuality. These whispers were that of the closest thing he had to friends.

He tried to focus on the lesson; really, he did. It was just hard to do with so many distractions. From the whispers to the shadow... shadows? But he'd covered his eye; why could he still see them?

That just made it even harder to focus. And by the time the last bell rang, he hadn't a clue what they'd just gone over for class. While everyone else was packing their things into their small bags or packs, he hurriedly tried to escape from what looked like a mass of bodies, some solid and others near nonexistent.

It was when everyone was rushing to get out that he encountered trouble. He didn't know how it happened, nor whose fault it was, (was there even someone to blame in situations like these?) All he knew was one second he had the bandage/patch, and then he could see with both eyes. There was a moment's relief of seeing to his fullest capacity, but that quickly died at the sound of a scream.

It was Sakura, the beautiful and smart Sakura who was now pale and pointing a shaking finger at him, drawing more attention.

"What happened to your eye?!"

 _'That can't be human; he's a monster! I knew he was freaky!'_

 _'Oh, I wonder if that's what the sharingan will look like. It'll be cool when Sasuke gets his!'_

He shook his head, trying to block out the voices. Of all people, why did Sakura have two?!

"I uh, it was a training accident!"

"No accident can make your eye look like that! I knew my mom was right! You _are_ a freak!"

 _'I knew he was never normal.'_

 _'What is that?!'_

 _'Disgusting.'_

 _'I always knew it was a cover-up. The brat really is the kyuubi!'_

He flinched. There was so much all at once, he couldn't keep up. And what was this about the kyuubi?!

He- he couldn't take it. He turned tail and _ran_. He pushed his way through the minor crowd, (probably also pushing at things that weren't there,) and immediately took to the roofs. In all of three days, his life had been fucked up more than he knew how to deal with.

He didn't think he'd come to school the next day.

* * *

 **Hi! I was hoping to incorporate 'The Book' into this chapter a bit more, but it seems that's just something for next chapter.**

 **Imma be honest, this fic is probably my second fav, _(if you haven't noticed.)_ It sucks that it's taking me so long to develop the plot, and I'll definitely have to edit once I'm done because I'm kind of shit at writing how I want characterization. Sorry it's not a ton of excitement at the get-go...**

 **Oh, and I apologize for my fluctuation with honorifics. I'm gonna try to keep them minimal, but some are just unavoidable if I want to keep that same level of closeness... On the other hand, please like, subscribe, and _definitely_ comment! Be it just what you think will happen, or a simple 'nice chappie,' I highly appreciate any and all comments you are willing to give me, _(so long as they aren't telling me how trash I am. I can do that myself, thank you.)_**


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